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©2010 Discover Aid: The Challenges Of Living In Your Midlife. All Rights Reserved.
.]]>I hear of people who are able to show empathy and care for their parents even though they were physically or / and emotionally abused by them. It feels hard to understand how a son or daughter can show unconditional care for a parent when this has happened, particularly in cases of the more extreme abuse.
This sort of experience tends to come into our lives as we hit our midlife.
Billy Connolly was one I recall from his biography written by his wife Pamela Stephenson.
I wonder if for some, its really the need for the son and daughter to try to make the father or mother be the parent they really wanted, trying as hard as they can to make it work right to the end.
I can only guess how hard this is.
A person I am aware of was emotionally abused by his parents. His father beat up his mother. His mother would tell him he, the son, was the only reason why she stayed and took the beatings.
He spent his childhood, and now his adult life constantly trying to gain their approval whilst they dangle it in front of him, needing him to do more and more for their narcissistic souls.
It then transfers through the generations and he is now doing exactly the same with his children.
Fortunately, his children now only live with their mother who is trying the best she can to remove the narcissism from their upbringing and heal the hereditary abuse that could have been going on for generations.
©2010 Discover Aid: The Challenges Of Living In Your Midlife. All Rights Reserved.
.]]>Here is a brief but useful list of symptoms of a low self-esteem.
©2010 Discover Aid: The Challenges Of Living In Your Midlife. All Rights Reserved.
.]]>Interesting article recently posted here about requiring self-esteem for building success. Essentially you have to believe in yourself to achieve anything that is worth succeeding in, from being a good parent to building your own business.
Essentially, you have to believe in yourself to continue to work at something, if you have low confidence your self esteem will break and you will find you give up on everything in your life that is ‘too hard’.
©2010 Discover Aid: The Challenges Of Living In Your Midlife. All Rights Reserved.
.]]>Personal development blogging guru Steve Pavlina talks in this article about changing careers over a lifetime. Albeit an older posting (April 2005) the message still holds true.
The decisions you make when you are in your twenties will more than likely be obsolete by the time you hit midlife. So expect this to happen and be prepared for any changes you may need to consider with your personal situation.
Expecting change means that when change comes, the transition will be smoother in what ever way it hits you.
©2010 Discover Aid: The Challenges Of Living In Your Midlife. All Rights Reserved.
.]]>I have experienced a person doing just this and it is a sad and selfish existence. Selfish because those that act this way are using others when they could be getting on with their lives with the knowledge that they are just a place holder.
I wouldn’t trust someone who had done this, keep an eye out for yourself here. You might find your midlife crisis’ed partner has a similar issue and is not being honest with you.
o check it out here at Divorce Issues, Lawyers, and Headaches.
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Guy
©2010 Discover Aid: The Challenges Of Living In Your Midlife. All Rights Reserved.
.]]>Go check here:
©2010 Discover Aid: The Challenges Of Living In Your Midlife. All Rights Reserved.
.]]>Recently a person close to me was tricked into engaging and responding to abuse they were receiving from their hard done by bitter ex husband (yes, the very same one who had the affair and uses the children to get to & punish his ex wife).
At the end of a long and circular debate involving pitiful excuses why he could not pick up one of his daughters for the weekend she lost her cool and told him he was, “a narcisistic idiot”
Having created anger he was pleased and simply responded, “I see you can’t even spell narcissistic”
I wondered if it would be fun to think of a few good responses to this, such as,
“I see you can read a dictionary at least”
or
“I take it you are far more fimiliar with the word than most then”
“I see you dont deny it. When are you going to get some help for it for the sake of the rest of us then?”
However. The message those who have lived with narcissism will tell you is:
Don’t engage.
Don’t try to change them, they never will.
They are too far abused and affected by this personality disorder to really acknowledge and change for the better.
As much as it would be great to give as good as you get, that is their life, that is their need. To engage and have confirmed their world of arrogance and hatred is real and that even the most calmed and kind of us are, deep down, willing to vent hatred.
The best thing to do is to leave them in their own sorry lives and spend a moment in hope for all vulnerable people that may be in their path.
That is their path, not yours. Your focus should be about self preservation and making sure you don’t bump into a new narcissistic in your future.
©2010 Discover Aid: The Challenges Of Living In Your Midlife. All Rights Reserved.
.]]>©2010 Discover Aid: The Challenges Of Living In Your Midlife. All Rights Reserved.
.]]>“Millions of people taking commonly prescribed antidepressants such as Prozac and Seroxat might as well be taking a placebo, according to the first study to include unpublished evidence.
The new generation of antidepressant drugs work no better than a placebo for the majority of patients with mild or even severe depression, comprehensive research of clinical trials has found.”
©2010 Discover Aid: The Challenges Of Living In Your Midlife. All Rights Reserved.
.]]>Lets not kid ourselves that we can sustain this pressure. Lets make just one step towards reducing our stresses today in some way. What are you going to do to reduce your stress level?
Read the full article here: http://ambientmusicgarden.com/blog/relaxation-meditation-music-less-stress.html
©2010 Discover Aid: The Challenges Of Living In Your Midlife. All Rights Reserved.
.]]>The article continues, “Seventy-four per cent of people said they felt generally positive about themselves.”
So what about the other 26 percent of us!! I think its time to take a serious look at our culture and what it is doing to us. If you look at other cultures around the world, those that have a simpler life, less complicated by materialism, technology and western needs you can see how a simpler life supports a more balanced mind and body.
©2010 Discover Aid: The Challenges Of Living In Your Midlife. All Rights Reserved.
.]]>Confident1 article on self-esteem.
©2010 Discover Aid: The Challenges Of Living In Your Midlife. All Rights Reserved.
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