Depression Triggered By A Midlife Crisis

Its at the time of year when the dark winter evenings set in & we see less light that most of us begin to feel down and gloomy. Generally we tend to migrate inside more and so get less fresh air. As humans we are naturally expecting to hibernate a little too, as we would have in our distant past, spending more time sleeping and so conserving energy whilst there is less food for the taking.

Because there is less hours of light a day, and what light we get is weaker, the natural colours of our environment are duller. In rural areas the contrast is greater as there is more colour in the summer time, most of which is lost in the winter.

The near the poles we live on earth the darker, and colder, will our winter be. Depending on our age and physical health we will feel the effects of the cold more on our bodies.

So if you are feeling not so good about your life anyway, your marriage is on the rocks, infidelity has invaded the peace of your home or you are dealing with a midlife crisis you are possibly so continuously fed up that you might be better described as depressed.

If your low feeling continues for long periods it will start to effect many things in your life. Your work life and your home life will be affected by being depressed. Your ability to make decisions and interact socially will become weaker.

The combination of a midlife crisis and the darker nights can make winter the hardest period of the year for many. Whilst the sun is out and warm maybe you can cope with the midlife crisis you are experiencing because natural light and the warmth of the sun are important fuels for the human body and spirit. It will enable you to see more optimism in your situation than compared to the dark cold and wet nights of winter.

A midlife crisis can be about indecision. It can be about a conflict of feelings and not knowing what to do, or where to go to solve how you feel. Commonly, individuals are in relationships that are hindering them in some way. Perhaps as you’ve got older you have felt that the relationship is wrong for you but you don’t know how to move ahead to address this issue. Its never that easy, children and loyalties will complicate the decision. Influences from outside such as family pressures as well as perhaps even a threat of abuse if you try to do something about your situation will put you into a corner with no clear way out.

You might begin to wonder what the point is of your life and begin to loose hope in your situation being resolvable, finding no way to move on. Whilst you feel this way it is not always easy to make decisions to do things that will enable you to get out of your rut.

When you are really feeling down you are beyond being able to make a decision about the most basic of things let alone work out what to do with your life. So to move on you need to get yourself better first, you wont be in a position to make a good decision until you are feeling more positive and not depressed. Getting better is about building yourself up again to become functional and able to make good decisions and follow them through.

First though, you need to feel better and able to take on the responsibility to change your life and move out of a midlife crisis successfully. Decide logically how you can take a small step each day, however small it is, towards making your future brighter. I understand it is so easy to sit and watch TV all day, watching the sun rise and set again. Think about whether when the best time of the day for you to get up and do something, maybe in the evening? Or after you have had a meal perhaps, or just when a friend has popped around to see how you are.

Decide what you want to do to move ahead. Maybe this is something you can talk through with someone so that you can share the hard decision making process and get a little support from someone in a way that means you are taking control for your life.

Use these following ideas to help to get out of the dark thinking times into brighter, more optimistic feeling times that will help you even more start to climb out of the depressive pit.

Perhaps choose just one a day to see what the effect is for you. Experience it and write the feelings down if they are positive and read them again when you are looking for positive encouragement.

Try One Of The Following Today

Go for a Walk (ignore the weather)

Get your coat, hat, scarf and gloves. Wrap up warm and go for a walk. Get out into the open, look up at the sky even if you cant see any blue sky, go to a shop and buy some chocolate or something else for a treat. Go buy a new pair of shoes perhaps. Don’t go too mad as this might become a bad habit!!

Come home, make yourself a hot drink and sit in front of a fire or radiator and write about how it was for you. Reflect and ask yourself, did it make you feel better?

If it did, think about what specifically made you feel better, perhaps it was the smile you got over the counter at the magazine shop maybe?

If there wasn’t much in it for you, try to think about what you could do to make it better next time. Don’t give up. Try to get out again tomorrow.

Listen to some comedy on radio or TV

This is easier than getting out in the cold is this for sure. However laughing is well known to help people who are feeling depressed and down cheer up and lift their spirits.

Get out and meet up with someone you know.

If you arent quite up to meeting a larger social group (see below for some ideas) you might want to just have some cosy time with someone you trust who is able to take some time out to natter for a while.

Try to talk about things that aren’t too complicated or hard to engage in (i.e. avoid talking about your situation too much, and avoid other subjects that you feel could be too taxing for you).

Talk about what you might like to do in the summer, or for your next day out somewhere. Try to ask more questions of the other person rather than have to answer many questions coming your way. Listen to them and enjoy their company.

Talk and laugh, ask them what makes them laugh and see where they get their joy. Meeting and integrating with other people is known to help people move out of a depressive state.

Once you do this a bit more regularly and are on the mend, perhaps these people will be able to offer their own advice on how to move on with your midlife crisis. After all, in the context of this article, it’s your midlife crisis that has triggered your depression.

Consider a hobby or other activity that is not too taxing or complicated.

Go and browse the magazine selves to see what interests you. Maybe there will be something there that draws you out of your isolation and into an interesting and new space where you meet interesting new people and have a common interest to talk about. People often love advising ‘newbie’s’ of a sport or hobby.

Surviving each day by prioritising and breaking down your daily activities

Sometimes dealing with what the post throws at you might be too much for you. Try to break it down and prioritise. Look at what you need to do and consider which is more important and try to focus on that. If you need to, ask for help with it. Perhaps you need to apply for something, a tax return for which requires you to complete a long and detailed form can feel daunting. Perhaps if someone can help you for 20 minutes this task will be behind you and not feel like a brick wall in front of you.

Over time, things will improve but don’t expect to wake up one day feeling completely changed.

If you are really dysfunctional you will need to get yourself to a doctor for a full diagnosis. Your doctor may subscribe you with drugs to lift you out of depression and support you for the duration of the prescription.

However once you stop taking the prescription you may be at risk of falling back into a depressed state again because you have not resolved your inner conflict that your midlife crisis is formed around. If this is where you find yourself it is a good idea to seek out a good counsellor in your area and commit to work with them with all that is within you.

If you have any experiences of depression that you would like to share with others here then I would be pleased to hear from you.

Guy

If you feel this article has been useful to you then please donate something to help me keep this site alive for others. Thank you.
[donation]

Filed under: Depression, Self-Esteem & Anxiety, Mid-Life Crisis

Here Are Some Other Articles That May Interest You. Please Click To Read.

Depression (mood) At Midlife; An Introduction

Depression Awareness A Casualty Of A Failing Healthcare System

Additional Resources About Depression

Additional Resources About Midlife Crisis

What Is A Midlife Crisis (part three)