Who ‘Owns’ Your Child’s Email Address After Divorce?
It suddenly dawned on me today. I set up an email account for my eldest daughter a few years ago which was used occasionally and all the email came from both sides of the family to her that way. No problem you would think. Wrong. For my ex-wife’s perspective this was a reason to feel projectionist about our daughter again. Previously my ex wife had contacted and insisted that all presents and birthday cards would come to her house for each of our children even though the children lived with me. It didn’t seem to bother the kids although I feel the beginnings of them trying to deal with the approval of their mother and the loyalty that comes with it. My ex wife was really harsh with her sister about it, a lady who has seen enough of issues between parents and the affect on children to know best to keep the children out of your own squabbles.
Anyway, today i realised that my ex wife has now set up an email account for my daughter that she asked all her family to send messages to for her instead of her original one.
If there a message in this for us all?
Well the one I can think about is to try really hard not to make your issues become your children’s.
If you feel guilty about the breakup of your marriage and the affect it has on your children think again about the ongoing approval and conditional love messages you may be giving them, and the damage this causes children at a time of great influence as they develop.
Then look up narcisssism.
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Filed under: Parenting
